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Love and family

“How has the birth of our son shaken our couple?”

19 December 2021, Maria
“How has the birth of our son shaken our couple?”

“He suffers from insomnia and can't stop complaining. He finds that he lacks freedom, that he is bored, and that we never do anything.”

“My couple is going through a crisis. Two years ago my partner and I had a child, a lovely little boy. It happened when we had just gotten together. A real surprise! The other surprise was when he told me he wanted to keep him. It must be said that at 38, he had remained single for twenty years, and led a hectic life. After prestigious studies, he had great adventures, whether sporting, sexual, or friendly. He traveled a lot and made a fairly good living.

But now, my little one takes up a lot of space. It takes a lot of time and attention, which is perfectly normal for a baby. But my companion seems to live it badly and it becomes more and more execrable with me. He oscillates between excessive gaiety and sadness. From moment to moment he becomes touchy, cynical and defeatist. He suffers from insomnia and can't stop complaining. He finds that he lacks freedom, that he is bored, and that we never do anything.

I don't know what to do to be up to the task, I have changed since the beginning of our relationship. I am much more independent. I agree to go out to play sports, see friends or participate in community life and that by getting involved with real pleasure. Relations with his mother are smoothed out, healthier; we call each other much more often. I accept visits from her ex, she stays for dinner, and we go to her birthday. I support him, listen to him when he is ill, look after him, cook meals for him, give him gifts, and encourage him to go out with his friends or to invite them home for a good meal. I don't see what else to do. When I start a discussion about us he runs away, tells me I'm painful, that he doesn't want to bother, and leaves the room or goes to see his best friend. Otherwise he sticks to his laptop. I am on the verge of taking my children and leaving.”
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