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Love and family

How to forget someone when you are crazy in love?

24 December 2021, Diarra Diop
How to forget someone when you are crazy in love?

Forgetting about someone who is obsessed with you can be really difficult. There is no quick fix, but with just a few steps, it is possible to leave the past behind and move on. Here is an easy guide to help those who need to forget about someone who is obsessing them.

Change your thoughts

Ask yourself why you are still hooked on this person, and answer it sincerely. It could be, “Oh, we had a great time together”, or “I think this person is really great”. Whatever your thought, express it. But also look at what you have potentially ignored about this person. "He was always late"; "he criticized me constantly". You may find that what you find ideal is not really ideal.

If you are trying to forget someone, there might be reasons why you don't want to think about them anymore. Identify them and tell yourself why you should use those reasons to move on.

Does the person you obsess over consistently treat you badly? ". Tell yourself that you deserve better than this. Find a way to increase your self-esteem. You don't need to dwell on someone who treats you badly just because you think you deserve them.

Does the person you obsess over have another boyfriend / girlfriend? ". People who have more than one relationship at the same time are inaccessible. If the person is cheating on their boyfriend with you, what tells you that they are not cheating on you too?

Have you had relationships in the past that never worked out? ". Surely you are loyal to this person, and you are afraid of what your life will be like without him / her. But sometimes, it's better to admit that you had a good time, and stop there. If you are truly meant for each other, your day will come.

Are any other factors, like parents, best friends, distance, age, etc., making the relationship difficult? ". If there are circumstances that you cannot control, then stop fighting with life and focus on the things that are in your power. You deserve someone great and practical. You will find that person.

Erase all the memories of that person from your daily life. It is said that absence makes the heart more affectionate. What you are not told is that too much absence also makes your heart distracted. In your case, this is a good thing!

Walk around your room and remove all the photos, letters, references to that person you are trying to forget. If you keep a journal in which you write about it, start a new one; try not to write on it.

To remove is not to destroy. Unless you want that person no longer in your life in your lifetime, do not destroy any items or memories associated with them. When you're old and with someone you love and who loves you, these memories will be fun to remember.

Play a matching game. A matching game is the stylish name for tricking your brain into relating the person to something bad, or a category of things that you don't like. In the short term, it will help you think about the things that you don't like about that person, rather than the things that make you obsessed with them.

The trick of this game is to think of something bad as soon as you think of that person. What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you think of her? Something good, probably? Try to think of something wrong, instead.

Does the person never take a shower, be arrogant or conceited, wear too much makeup, never follow through, etc? Whatever trait that person is worst for you, focus on it. Don't be mean, but engrave it in your head, so that as soon as you think of him or her, that image comes to mind.

Some faults often associated with boys: too conceited, arrogant, too proud; takes advantage of other people; too obsessed with his appearance; does not get along well with others; has no respect or good manners; is not curious about what is going on in the world; is obsessed with money and sex; is macho and demeans women; is not trustworthy.

Some faults often associated with girls: too talkative; too focused on trivial things (stars, makeup, etc.); does not take risks, is not reckless; does not have a sense of humor; is "fake" and wants everyone to like it; is obsessed with money; doesn't know how to just hang out with boys.

Change your habits

Avoid being in the same place as the person, if possible. Avoiding the person is a great way to let your body and mind know that there are many other people on the planet who may require your attention. Quite simply because it's true: there are a lot of people waiting for you, and your life doesn't have to revolve around one.

Maybe you run into this person at school or at a joint activity. In this case, avoid it as much as possible. Don't sit down with her at lunch, sign up for the same projects. As much as possible, be in different places at different times.

Don't put yourself in a situation where you risk falling on top of each other. If he attends a lot of concerts in the summer, go play tennis instead. If she haunts malls every Saturday, shop during the week.

If you have to be in the same room as this person or accidentally cross paths, just smile, have a quick chat if necessary, and find an excuse to leave. “Sorry, my friend needs help with a project,” or something like that will do just fine.

Ignore it. Try not to speak or even look at this person. It's hard to control your thoughts, of course, but when that person is doing something to get your attention or be close to you, try to ignore it and look at something else. You won't get past your obsession and move forward if you take things as they come.

Place a loose rubber strap around your wrist. Whenever you think of that person, stretch it out and then slam it lightly against the inside of your wrist. It works for people who want to quit smoking. An obsession is a habit of thought (a certain way of thinking) that you can break through a negative mechanism, such as the pain of the bracelet against your wrist. You will quickly find that your thoughts crop up less frequently in your brain. It is progress!

Create new opportunities

Find a new activity. If you are still obsessed with this person, it may also be because you have too much time to let your thoughts wander. It's not a horrible thing, but it surely gives you too many opportunities to dream in broad daylight. Choose a new passion by diving into something that occupies you and makes you happy, or explore something entirely new!

If you are a girl, consider hiking, playing sports, being interested in marine biology, fashion, photography, writing, gardening, rollerblading, sculpture. Anything that keeps you going is good to take. Don't worry if you choose something deemed masculine.

If you are a boy, consider hiking, driving a sports car, surfing, rafting, debating, playing chess, interested in writing, architecture, camping, photography, to robots, etc. Anything that keeps you going is good to take. Do whatever turns you on, even if it's traditionally a girl-only area.

Volunteer. Volunteering is important because it shows all you have to offer. It also forces you to realize that your little problems (trying to stop obsessing about someone) are privileged person's problems.

Rely on your friends. Your friends are there to help you through thick and thin. They advise you and offer you a shoulder on which to console you. Go out with your friends, be happy by their side. Don't just sit in your room, isolated from the people who love you.

Get revenge, if necessary. Not on the physical level. Rather, it means that you can do anything to show that person that you don't give a damn about them anymore. Sometimes you just need to be yourself to do this. Stop trying to impress her like you did before. Instead, start doing the things that "you" want to do, like wearing the clothes you like, playing the sport you love, listening to the music you love, and so on.

Go somewhere you've never been. As stated before, it doesn't have to be very far or very expensive. As long as you are interested in going, traveling can be a great way to stop thinking about someone.

Talk to locals, get involved in the local community and have fun. When you travel, focus on your “new you”. The latter is excited to learn, takes more risks, and wants to live new experiences. What is the use of traveling if you don't open up to the outside world? Go on a trip. You don't have to go far, if that's not practical. Many people take the time to “reinvent themselves” after a breakup, moving to places like India or South America. These places are far away and the plane ticket is expensive to go there, so it is not always easy. But find a place that is special to you.

Take your time. Remember: forgetting someone takes time. It can take you years to get over someone. But it gets easier and easier over time. Life is never simple, but the more you understand it, the better you will understand yourself, and the easier it will be. Quickly you'll look back, laugh, and ask yourself, “What was I thinking?
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