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Love and family

Why are men afraid of marriage?

21 December 2021, Laure
Why are men afraid of marriage?

Who among us has not experienced personally or not through a friend, this situation in which the lover, in a relationship for some time, desperately waits for her dear and tender to ask for her hand? Why do men often have this fear of the day when their friend will tell them about marriage?

I asked myself this question some time ago and I probed a few men around me in order to get some answers. But first, let's start from the beginning...

Why do women want to get married?

Sometimes men criticize that all we care about in marriage is the dress. This is not completely wrong, but this is for the D-day of the wedding! And after all, who hasn't dreamed of being the star of the day as a child? Without the miserable side which precedes obviously, but yes, the majority of the girls want to see this dream of fairy tale come true, and the marriage is well the occasion in its life if there must be only one to shine!

But for the rest, I would go over all the secondary reasons that we can sometimes hear (showing the whole world that we love each other, social or family pressure ...), to go directly to the real one: to do the bet to live to the last breath with the person you love, for better or for worse. This is a detail that many men forget!

So yes, there is a commitment, for sure, but there are many others in life, such as children, real estate ownership which are not less. The men I interviewed often told me about the fear of divorce, and that it was the marriage itself that destroyed the couple. This is something that has always challenged me...

Why could an act of love destroy it?

Very often, it is because by getting married, one can think that the love of the other is acquired definitively, and many people do not make any more efforts. When we say "for better or for worse", it does not mean “that we do badly or things well,” at least not only, it is especially in relation to what can happen to us!

Perhaps more than women who often see the life in pink when it comes to love and marriage, men have their feet on the ground, which may make them think that the pretty young woman they currently have by their side will no longer bother to be so once the deed has been signed. There is therefore some work to be done on this side, to prove to the man in his life that once husband and wife, everyone must continue to please their spouse, in order to win the bet.

Lastly, we must not forget the experience of each one either: man or woman, the one who will have divorced parents will not necessarily have the same point of view as the one whose parents still love each other.

The statistical media take great pleasure in telling us that nowadays, almost one in two marriages ends in divorce. Maybe we should start thinking that you have at least half the chances of staying together? And above all, since when are you just a statistical figure to come and not just a single couple?

Your story, it is not an average that defines it, it is you!
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